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It’s a Baby! The Secrets of Baby Shower Etiquette

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To attend a baby shower is to celebrate a new life, so be sure to make it a festive, gracious affair

When a family member, friend, or co-worker is expecting, hosting a shower is a great way to ensure the new parents have the gear they need for the new arrival. Here’s how to make it an unforgettable event.

Pick a Date

Traditionally, a shower is scheduled to take place four to eight weeks before the baby is expected to arrive, which means the invitations need to be sent four to six weeks prior to allow everyone sufficient time to arrange their schedules to attend.

While they require a lot of effort, written invitations with pre-addressed, stamped response cards are preferred. Yes, emails and texts are much easier to send to the guests, but they are also too easy to accidentally overlook or outright miss. A written invitation creates a sense of urgency to respond and makes it much more likely that guests will actually show up.

Be a Gracious Host

The mom-to-be doesn’t have to be a daughter, sister, or other family member; anyone with a close connection, such as a friend, neighbor, or co-worker, can host a baby shower.

These events are all about the new mom, but that doesn’t mean the guests can’t have a blast, too. Make sure you have plenty of snacks for everyone, and make it festive with games and music. Encourage everyone to take and share photos with each other and on social media platforms for those who were unable to attend in person. Use an app like Zoom to let those who are far away join in on the fun. As you begin to organize the event, get others involved to help with ideas, venues, and to split costs. View it as a great opportunity to make new friends and to strengthen the bond with old friends.

Every Baby Matters

Contrary to what many may assume, a baby shower isn’t just reserved for a first child; showers for second, third, or more children are referred to as “sprinkles,” because by that point, the new parents probably don’t need quite as much equipment and gear for subsequent children. However, if there is a long gap between the first child and the not-yet-here one, the parents may need to gear up all over again. If twins (triplets?) are expected, more items will be needed and very much appreciated. Make the sprinkle as festive and fun as the first shower to show support and share happiness with the parents.

Let Them Choose

If you’re not sure what the expectant parents might need, and there’s no registry listing the most desired items, a gift certificate is always a good idea—this is one rare example in which one size does fit all! Use a nationally accepted card such as Amex to ensure the most versatility and choice of retailers. Selecting a specific retailer might inadvertently limit where and on what the parents can use the gift certificate. Another option to consider is the time-honored gift of cash in an envelope with a heartfelt note on a ”Congratulations!” card.

Invite Them All

Traditionally, baby showers have been ladies-only affairs, attended by sisters, moms, aunts, and female co-workers and friends of the expectant mom. But now, it’s certainly OK to invite the guys, too. However, inviting children is a strong “maybe,” subject to their age and how many might attend. You certainly want those with their own newborns to bring the babies, but if too many kids show up, it can dilute the atmosphere of the party as guests change diapers or chase hyperactive 10-year-olds around the house.

Sandy Lindsey

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Sandy Lindsey is an award-winning writer who covers home, gardening, DIY projects, pets, and boating. She has two books with McGraw-Hill.



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