America’s history with Easter and how celebs enjoy the holiday
Easter Sunday. The date’s flexible. Not set in stone like July Fourth. They say the date changes depending on the moon’s position. Which means what?
Like where’s this moon going? Shopping?
The rabbit symbol began in Colonial America with German immigrants in the 18th century. Quakers, Episcopalians, Catholics, Presbyterians eventually assimilated after the Civil War.
In the 1880s, Easter became a major holiday.
Germanic custom supplied children with colored eggs. Boys used caps, girls their bonnets as nests. So why eggs?
Per an Allentown professor: “The old German goddess of spring was Ostara (meaning Easter). She rode in a wagon drawn by Pennsylvanian rabbits. The egg emblem signifies renewal of life in the spring. And white symbolizes purity and grace.”
Time passed. Chocolates got added. Candywise, egg hunts and egg-rolling developed.
The official White House egg roll began April 22, 1878, with President Rutherford B. Hayes.
He was out for a walk when kids suggested it. That was after they got tired asking about his first name.
Gwen Stefani made one video dressed as a pink bunny.
Robert Downey did a photo wearing a costume with long ears.
David Beckham made a video feeding Coco, the family bunny, a carrot.
Later came pretzels. Intertwined they resemble arms crossing in prayer. I
n the 1930s, jelly beans. Their shape reminiscent of the Easter Bunny delivering eggs.
The sign of new life. Because they were President Reagan’s favorite candy, their makers created a special blueberry flavor for his inauguration.
Today 16 billion of them get cranked out — enough to circle our planet (omitting Bragg’s hovel) three times over.
Calling red a victory over death, Greece did red eggs. Mesopotamia also.
Once Reese Witherspoon shared a photo with husband Jim Toth, both wearing bunny ears, arms wrapped around one another smiling widely.
The bunny ears stayed. The wide smile not. They’re divorcing.
Priyanka Chopra, dressed in sunshine yellow, made lunch featuring bunny-shaped cupcakes. Liev Schreiber prepped Passover brisket with the World Central Kitchen for Ukrainians fleeing the war. Kardashians got giant chocolate eggs (possibly shaped like their rump bump?) engraved with their name.
Flowers? The Easter lily. Also daffodils, tulips, hyacinth, daisy and — ready? — the gypsophila, a k a baby’s breath.
This holiday marks an end of Lent. The fast is fast over and the fastest choice of stuffing ourselves is bread. It’s a run on rolls, muffins, hot cross buns.
Bed hopping season
Easter brought us rotten hard-boiled egg Bragg.
Remember Clinton doing youknowwhat with youknowwho almost teenager in the youknowwhere White House?
Hillary’s maybe not such good tricks that we’ve learned about? JFK in and out of more beds than Hilton’s housekeeper? Eisen-hower who steered his longtime lady driver?
Woodrow Wilson? Not faithful. FDR?
His secretary saw more of him than his missus. LBJ wouldn’t have recognized his wife if she sat on him. Harding? Reagan? Jefferson? About George Washington, not sure. I doubt Martha moved like sex pro Stormy Daniels.
Queens Boulevard. Two friends meet. Sal: “How you feeling?” Hal: “Lousy. Hardening of the arteries, high blood pressure, arthritis.” Sal: “Sorry to hear it. What’ve you been doing?” Hal: “Same thing I’m doing for the last 20 years. Still selling health foods.”
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.
